Have you heard of anyone winning an online lottery? Why not? Quite often we hear of people winning lotteries of other forms, yet not the online variety. Evidently, not hearing about others winning (and perhaps for some of us, an expensive and futile overseas call) turns us off to these ads. I suppose an industry in these ads is almost non-existent.
I have a proposition for its revival.
A trivial method to revive the industry ofcourse is to give the odd chap a million dollars... a genuine reward under the glare of the press cameras. Yet, that, will cost a million dollars, and people who have a million dollars, probably won't be reading this. No, this is not the solution I am proposing. What needs to be done is rather different. What we need is borrow from a key aspect of religion - miracles. Let's compare what we know of miracles and Online Lotteries:
|
| Miracles
| Online Lottery
|
| Has it ever worked for you?
| Nope
| Nope
|
| Has it worked for some close relative/friend? | No
| No
|
| For someone you dont know but heard of having worked for?
| Yes
| No
|
| Have you heard of scams involving them? | Yes, several | Yes, each time I click the ads |
| Do you think you deserve one? | Heavens! Yes! | Hell Yeah! |
| Do its peddlers ask for your money?
| Yes
| Yes
|
Being alike in so many forms, its almost shocking that the online lottery people won't scramble to close the gap and remove the one crucial difference between them... get people talking about it! Get the buzz going.
They don't need to pay people millions of dollars. They don't even need to get people to say that lotteries work. Get them to ask, do they work? Get some of them saying that its all a scam. Get some of them saying, "Well, I haven't won one myself, but I have heard of this guy in ....". Get some of them to ask their friends, "What do you know of online lotteries? I'm thinking of trying to win one. What with all my problems, heaven knows I need one." Get them to start saying, "I know of this site where when you click the ad from..."
Wait, that's not all. The most lucrative option would be to join the peddlers of miracles.
Go to the evangelists who heal the people with internal diseases/disorders (they never seem to grow back limbs as you know). Ask them to pray an online lottery for poor Martha, a pale but pretty looking single mother who has to feed five of her children on her own. Get her to do a ceremonial 'click' in front of a crowd of people praying, waiting with bated breath as she clicks the ad banner, egged on by the good Reverend's imploring the crowd to "Pray for Martha! Get down on your knees and call the Lord to your computer" as she enters her personal details into the form. Get Martha, upon clicking it to say... "I'm sorry. Its not working," stifling a sob. And just is as she is about to walk off the stage, get her cellphone to ring. Let her pick up and talk for a few seconds, anxiety writ on her face "Yeah, this is Martha... yes... uh huh... um... yes... are you sure? Are you completely sure... OMG.. " (at which point the pastor gently rebukes her saying, "Don't take the Lord's name in vain my child") "...can you confirm that....Alright.... I see... alright, I'll be there" and then get her to put down her phone, face the crowd and tell the crowd with a wavering voice, with a smile now on her tearful face, "I won! Praise the Lord, I won... we won!"
