A Vulnerability Study

No one makes light of these things but I couldn’t resist. India is probably the most vulnerable nation once an explosive goes off. Note the stress on the necessity of the precondition that an explosive needs to have gone off before the following predictions come into play.

This is primarily because of the fact that the Indian psyche doesn’t reflexively suggest evasive action as soon as the sound of gunshots or explosives going off is heard, in stark contrast to the Western psyche that prompts the subject to duck at the mere suggestion of an explosion.

This propensity that Indians share can attributed to the difference in the thoughts that loud bangs trigger in Indians as compared to their Western counterparts:

  Indians                                The West

 (Loud series of bangs)                       (Bang)
    |                                                          |
    Diwali? No...                                OMG! Its a Bomb!
          |                                                                 |
          Did we win a Cricket match?          Take cover!
                      |                                                         |
                Some damned political rally?         We are all going to die!
                            |                                                         |
                      We won a cricket match!?            What if it was tipped with a biological warhead?!!
                                  |                                                           |
                              (if in Chennai) Death procession?   Will I inhale less toxins if inside my car?
                                        |                                                           |
                               Where are all these people running?    Wait! Call 911!
                                              |                                                            |
                                  Is that guy carrying a gun?                 Why is my car's tire flat?
                                                    |                                                            |
                                        OMG! A terrorist! Run!                      Damn! Its just the tire!

This is why I like New Year's day. Its probably the one day where the West is as vulnerible after an explosion or after the gunfire starts as we in India are. Everybody thinks its the fireworks. In fact, we are a little safer in India. I mean, how many New Year firecracker extravaganza's do we see in India anyway? The difference in reception to fireworks in the Indian psyche as opposed to the Western may be summed up as:

 India                                        The West

 (Fireworks go off!)                                (Fireworks go off!)
    |                                                                      |
   Jesus! Who's payin for all this?                       Awesome!